Who to invite to graduation ceremony

by Barbara
(Hebron, CT)

I am in an uncomfortable situation. My oldest child is the first to graduate from college. The graduation is one state away from my own home state, so I know my exhusband, his mother and sisters and families would most likely attend if invited. I have been divorced for over 20 years, remarried for 19 years, I do not see or speak to my exhusband who has not financially supported my son growing up or paid for any of his college expenses. I am still on good terms with his sisters and mother. I plan to have a graduation party at my home a few weeks after graduation and will invite my ex-husband and his family to the party. If my son invites them to attend the ceremony, am I obligated to include them in our plans for after the ceremony? I would like to take my son and his girlfriend to dinner that evening, and do not want to have to invite my ex and his family to join us. My own mother and sister and family will be joining us for dinner, but I do not want to include the ex and his family. Is it ok to invite them just to the ceremony and to the party at my home a few weeks later?