Teaching Social Skills
Teaching social skills to yourself or your children must first start with understanding the concept of "respect". Without respect, the need for social skills cannot be grasped. What is respect and how it molds the way a person should think and act is explored more fully in the linked page. Etiquette, then, is a means to show respect for others and to gain respect from others.
Once the concept of respect is understood, having respect for others is something more easily achieved. What are the things that you admire or hold in esteem? Are there attributes that you see in others that you seek to develop? Are these "things" material items or something more intangible? When having respect for others,
Respect is freely given, not earned.
In identifying those attributes that we respect, how does one
show respect? Is it always an overt physical gesture or something more subtle and meaningful? Showing respect is important to reinforce civilized behavior and a means for better positioning yourself in polite society.
This, then, begs the question of
how to get respect. Everyone likes to be recognized for things we do well. But, as the saying goes:
Respect is something that is earned.
We should expect to "earn" the respect of others through our actions and how we treat others. So, although we should give respect freely, we should expect to earn expect. This may seem to be a disconnect, but in the end, we cannot demand to be given respect by others, but we should be open minded enough to accept the views of others.
This, then, serves as the basis for exploring the
importance of manners. Having good manners, then, is one means for showing respect for others as well as for earning respect for oneself. The importance of good manners should not be underestimated, as good or poor manners will be noticed and taken into account in business and social settings and will impact how a person is viewed.
Teaching
good manners for children, then, is an essential responsibility for any parent so that the full potential of a child can be realized. Children showing good manners are viewed as a pleasure to be around and more likely to be brought into and accepted in social circles and receive more life opportunities. Therefore, teaching social skills is essential for the future success of the child.
Respect for children and showing
respect for elders are two instances examined in further detail. One represents the hope for the future, while the other is to understand the lessons of the past and how the things that our elders experienced and did for our benefit impacted our lives.
Teaching social skills is based on understanding "respect" and applying it in our daily lives or helping to demonstrate to others how this way of being will lead to a better world.
Resources for Teaching Social Skills and Respect
Below you will find a selection of books that provide an outline on teaching respect, values, discipline and social skills ranging from the very young up through the teenage years. In addition, there are several books listed that address bullying, really the opposite of respect, and how to deal with it as both a child or an adult. If you do not find exactly what you are looking for, click on the store name to be taken to the book store's website for a deeper search on the title you desire.
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