Brother has reniged on a decision causing a dilemma.

by Carrie
(Boston, MA)


We have our niece and nephew visit us every year. This year our 17 year old niece asked if her boyfriend could come along and her parents (my sister and brother-in-law) were ambivalent. Through a series of miscommunications (and rather wishful thinking on my niece's part) it turns out the boyfriend's family bought the ticked unbeknownst to us or my brother-in-law and his wife. In an emergency meeting the night before the trip, everyone decided that it would be ok if the boyfriend flew the 800 miles to visit with us. We have been happily hosting him, along with our niece and nephew, for two days. We received a call today from my brother-in-law today saying they changed their mind and want the boyfriend to leave immediately and they will pay for it. Neither his parents, nor I want him to leave. What do we do?

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Whi is visiting whom ...
by: Miss P Etiquette

Dear Carrie from Boston, MA

Frankly, I do not see a problem. You invited this person to your home, you are enjoying his company and apparently he likes being there. There is no reason for you to ask him to leave. Also, there is no reason for you to support your brother-in-law's change of mind. The decision was made and your guest is there now.

Searching for some etiquette application within this convoluted situation I have this to say: It is never polite to un-invite someone. It is never in good taste to suggest that someone else un-invite someone.

I hope you all enjoy your time together rather than enhancing the negativity of the situation by dwelling on it. That will surely ruin any good time.

Miss Practical Etiquette

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